Love and Marriage

Truth is said to be the first casualty of war. The same is said for love and intellect. Intellect is the price that one has to pay for getting love. This assumption is rather false as it is not in love but marriage, where one has to lose his wit and at times guts too. Marriage starts from the point where love ends. It is evident from all the great love stories from Romeo Juliet to our very own Heer Ranjha. You will find only two similarities between all these stories, one is love and the second is that the lead protagonists never got married.

One thing is for sure that all these legendary love stories would not have been such legends if those lovelorns had married each other. Romeo would have still died but not by drinking poison by eating the “teen’daas” that Juliet would have cooked for him. Ranjha instead of running “I hate Qaido club” would have organized a “Qaido fan club” as that crippled, bhung enthusiast was the only one who tried to talk some sense into Ranjha. Had Sohni opted for an uber ride instead of that ill-fated attempt to cross the river with the help of a clay pitcher, then Mahiwal would have been dropping-off children at school and buying “unda double roti” for life instead of grazing buffaloes for Sohni’s father. Punhunn instead of passing as a washer man for Sassi’s father would only needed a “sarkari nokri” to qualify for Saasi’s hand in marriage. On the other hand, assume had these couples been alive in today’s time and day, I assure you that they have still stayed unmarried but because of variety of reasons such as dowry, phupho ka bay’ta, mah life mah rules and papa kee princess attitude of the girls. In short marriage is the “m” in love means there is no marriage in love.

Jokes apart, the truth is that I was lying until now just to make you to read these last two paragraphs. Marriage is the logical conclusion of love. If love is Fakhar Zaman’s century then marriage is Aamir’s three wickets; you cannot win a match without both. The amount of happiness that one gains from love and then marriage, does not requires one to be an Einstein to feel it, a mere simple human made of flesh and blood can feel it.

Love also do not deprive you from intellect, it is a world of its own which has its own standards of sagacity and wisdom. Love enriches you in such ways that Mansoor starts chanting An-al-Haq; you no longer stay you, you become theirs and them. This transformation can only be understood by those who go through the ordeal of loving someone. May you get love and marriage; whichever of these two gifts come first always hope and pray that it is followed by the second one. May your love be the sea where intellect floats and hate drowns.     

The girl with a big yellow umbrella

No sun rays

No raindrops that are pouring

No unwanted gaze can reach her

Her big yellow umbrella keeps every unwanted thing away

Walking while holding it in her hands, she looks like some burning meteor

But for many she is a shooting star

They wish upon watching her

Their days turn brighter than that yellow umbrella

There are legends about her

Some say she is a princess on the run

Some call her the lady of the night

Some just call her ordinary

Some wish, some lust and some fear her

But still everybody thinks about her, talks about her

And she like any dream lives on passes by but nobody can catch her

A futile pursuit

But a worthy one

If that yellow umbrella do not make its way through the street

We fear that the sun might not come out

The time will stop breathing

In short, that yellow umbrella is imperative for our survival

The truth is  

She has no name

No address

But a single identity

The girl with a big yellow umbrella

That bench in the garden

That bench in the garden

That shrub that always covers it from the above

Today when you were not there

I sat there alone for the first time

I have never felt that slab this cold before

And that shrub without a flower before

I reminisced the long talks

The grass that was beneath our feet

You know it is still yellow

The breeze that made your hair go sway

Has stopped since you have gone

That anthill that worried you so much

The ants have vacated it

But they have repaired the swings

And you can here children laughing

Amidst all this I realized what that bench is

It is a shrine

A shrine where my love with your memories is buried

I paid my respects

A nice place where I can mourn our love

Those endless numbered sunny days

They just do not go away

Even if I try

Even if I cry

The question of Pakistani Hindus

According to Pakistan Bureau of Statistics, Hindus make about 1.60%[1] of all of Pakistan’s population. At the time of independence, there was a sizeable population of Hindus in the areas that became part of Pakistan but majority of them opted for India. However, still a lot of Hindus were living in the Eastern wing of the country but after the dismemberment of Pakistan, the province of Sindh became the largest province to house Hindu population; Hindus make about 6.51% of Sindh’s total population.[2]

In the near past, many Hindu families have migrated from Sindh to India. India is the natural destination for the Pakistani Hindus as they share religious, cultural and familial ties there. The majority of Pakistani Hindus have settled in the Indian states of Gujrat and Rajasthan; both these states share a border with the Pakistani province of Sindh too.

However, for the migrants things have not been all that great in India. As India is not a signatory of UN Refugee Convention. So, the migrants have to live in make shift camps without any electricity and water. Above that they are suspected for being Pakistani spies and the Indian agencies closely monitor their movement. Getting Indian citizenship is also not easy as it comprises of strict and lengthy procedure, the migrants have to bear a life that is, in short, miserable and difficult. Although the Indian government has taken steps to fast track the process of acquiring Indian citizenship but it is still far from producing the desired results.

The real questions here are why this is happening and what the state and citizenry of Pakistan should do about it?

Pakistan repeatedly reiterates that the Hindus are safe in Pakistan, they enjoy religious freedom and all this is mere Indian propaganda to malign Pakistan’s image and to divert world’s attention from the atrocities faced by the Indian minorities at the hands of Hindu extremists. However, all is not false propaganda or mere exaggeration. This situation is an outcome of many stimulants and the major ones are discussed below.

Firstly, extremism is on rise everywhere in the world, Pakistan in general and Sindh in specific are no exception. Secondly, Sindh has a very secular history but today it is not the reference point. The reference point is the bitter partition of 1947 which caused the unfortunate communal riots which took lives of many men, women and children from both the sides (i.e. Hindus & Muslims). Thirdly, in certain parts of interior Sindh, the Hindus do enjoy political and social power; their position makes them susceptible to this kind of defiance. Fourthly, the competition over the economic opportunities, there will be less competition once the Hindus will not be there to claim it. Fifthly, the cultural compatibility is another reason as the Hindus find more cultural affinity in India than in Pakistan. Sixthly, the maltreatment meted out to the Indian Muslims causes irritation, which is eventually vented out on the Pakistani Hindus.   

The frustration has been manifested in the shape of forced conversions, abduction for ransom of the Hindu traders and their families hate speech and the eventual migration of Hindus to India.

It is important to note that the government is not all ignorant of this situation and has shown some concern. Sindh provincial assembly did pass a bill namely “the protection of minorities’ bill” earlier this year. The bill sets an age for marriage and conversion and punishment for forced conversion but due to the pressure from the religious parties and due to some other political compulsions, the bill has been swept under the carpet in the name of “review”. It is imperative that the government should take a stand and that bill should be implemented in its letter and spirit. However, the government should not only stop at passing a bill but it should do more in this regard.

The Federal government should take actions to facilitate the return of willing Hindu migrants from India. Pakistan’s High Commission in India can act as a liaison in this regard. The government should take all necessary actions to rehabilitate them upon their return and take steps to ensure their security and well-being.

Special task forces should be established with members from both the Hindu community and the local civil authorities to address the grievances of Hindus at the grass root level and also to chalk out plans to improve the condition of the Pakistani Hindus.

Places situated in Pakistan that are sacred to Hinduism, should be preserved, renovated and open for carrying out religious activities. This will not only strengthen Pakistan’s Hindu connection but the national exchequer will also benefit from the religious tourism.

The buck stops at the government and they have to realize that they are responsible to their people irrespective of their creed and race. They are the ultimate power in the country. The law provides safeguards to our minorities and the government should make this their priority that these safeguards are rightfully provided to the minorities and it should also school the majority to respect the rights of the minorities. This is the only way through which they can realize Quaid’s vision of Pakistan.
( A version of this piece has been published by Express Tribune in their blog section on 25th August 2017)

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[1] Pakistan Bureau of Statistics, http://www.pbs.gov.pk/content/population-religion, approached on 01/08/2017

[2] ibid

Something for our daughters

It is a reality that women in Pakistan are far from being emancipated and are not treated at par with men. This bias is deeply embedded in our social structure but when a woman gets an opportunity to break free from these social shackles, at the same time she becomes responsible for other women too. It becomes her responsibility that with her character and actions becomes a role model for others. If she fails somehow, she fails the other too. Her failure closes door of opportunity for other too. This responsibility does not mean to bear with being harassed, to be undermined or being asked for sexual favors.

Our society too is embracing this change, gradually. But still a lot of distance has to be covered. The definition of modern woman does not fit in our society’s definition of woman. It still suspects the character of a working woman. We still nurture our pre-conceived notions.

At the same time it is important to remember that there is a social red line which has to be respected. Our society can never be and should never become like the one in the west. It should maintain its individuality. We should retain our social soul which is a mix of the old eastern values and our Islamic identity but at the same time we should remove all such social practices which have become redundant and act as an obstacle in our nation’s development and progress. In short, we should shun such social practices but not dopatta. The problem is that according to some, the social symbols which are attributed with our women are the tools and means through which women are oppressed. Similarly, there are sections in our society who think that wearing a pair of jeans make a female’s character lewd. Both are wrong in their assumptions as mentioned above, on the contrary, it is the social structure that has to be amended and the process of “social synthesis” should be supported. It is important that this process should an ongoing one. The example of Khadija Siddiqi’s case can be used here. She was being admonished for a relationship, a relationship in which she was not the lone stakeholder and most importantly the relationship was not the subject matter of that case. Judiciary of Punjab especially the chief justice should be praised for taking a personal interest in the case. Such precedents will give courage to other women too, who have to bear exploitation in the name of honor, respect, religion and society.

This brings me to Ayesha Gulalai and her shocking revelations. Something that makes these claims more shocking is the fact that they are aimed at Imran Khan, the PTI chief and a Prime Minister hopeful. Imran’s past life makes many to happily buy Ayesha’s claims. Her accusations range from allegations of financial corruption to sending of inappropriate messages by Mr. Khan.

I am no one to judge here. Frankly, I have more sympathies for Miss Ayesha than Mr. Khan. , Keeping in mind her tribal roots, her path to MNAship would not have been an easy one. The tribal belt, commonly known as FATA is traditionally seen as a regressive society. But her father not only supported her but also supported her younger sister, Maria Toor who plays squash and has also represented Pakistan at the international level, against all odds. Like the rest of Pakistan, FATA too is changing, this year; Zarmina Wazir became the first female from FATA to be allocated to the prestigious Pakistan Administrative Services not only that, she also topped among the candidates from FATA. Ayesha, if not was the change; she surely was and is the face of changing Pakistan in general and FATA in particular.

This brings me back to my earlier argument; this opportunity and responsibility make her responsible for others too. She claims that Mr. Khan sent her a lewd message for the first time in 2013, it would have been better, had she gone public with the accusations, right away and right then. Bringing those alleged messages into public notice after 4 years makes her case weak and her intentions suspicious.

I reiterate that I am not a judge but I seriously believe that these allegations should be investigated thoroughly and whosoever is found of any wrongdoing whether Mr. Khan (i.e. for inappropriate behavior and financial corruptions) or Miss Ayesha (i.e. for labeling false accusations), an example should be made out of them. So, nobody, in future, can use their position to exploit anyone else. There are other reasons too, which highlight why a stern action is imperative. It is important because we need to strengthen that confidence which has been achieved after so many sacrifices and hardships. It is important that nobody uses his or her gender to exploit other or use his or her gender as a shield or an excuse and it is also important because no one of us wants that door of opportunity to close for our daughters. After all, all of us want a society that treats our daughters well, as an equal and without any discrimination, a society which gives them an equal opportunity to grow. We all owe this to our daughters. 

Game of thrones, Season 7, Episode 2 & us

It is interesting to observe that how the second episode of the ongoing 7th season of Game of thrones is relevant to our prevailing political scenario.
First the weather of Dragonstone is pretty much like that of Islamabad, it is raining in both.
Varys address to Daenerys reminds one of the establishment and their ideology of loyalty.
Jon naming Sansa as her replacement while he is gone to Dragonstone, is ditto what Nawaz Sharif did after his disqualification, that is, he named his sibling as his replacement.
Qyburn showed Cersai a crossbow weapon to kill the dragons and we also learned that what article 62 and 63 can do.
Theon jumps-off the ship instead of defending Yara, is a bit like the Nisar-Nawaz saga.
The Supreme Court pretty much like Sam is attempting to cure a deadly, infectious disease though the treatment is hard and painful but the end result is expected to be good.
Missandei and Greyworm making love pretty much depicts our relationship with democracy. We and Greyworm, both cannot consummate the relationship.
That is all. Thank you!!

Madhoo!!

Madhoo, do you know why there is a lot of thunder when it rains in the night because the clouds protest on raining at night, they say in the nights the girls are asleep dreaming but in the day when they are awake, we soak them and make them to sing songs for their loved one, drenched, they embrace each droplet of rain in a way, of which a thirsty grain of dessert can never think of. 
Madhoo, you know these prairies or water bodies never get satisfy or fill, their thirst is infinite but these beautiful maidens gives us some purpose or a sense of accomplishment or a feel of finally achieving something.
Madhoo, you know these drops of rains are like the very cells that make up your being, so when it rains we give away our existence and soak them and make them to endure a pain that is not excruciating enough to kill them but to make them hard enough to wait. It is this purpose that makes us to collect our fallen cells again and rain once again to make them to sing and dance and miss them who they cannot meet for now.