پشاور کا ایک قبرستان

پشاور کا ایک قبرستان ہے۔ جس میں بہت سی چھوٹی چھوٹی قبریں ہیں۔ ان قبروں کی مٹی سے عجیب سی مشک آتی ہے۔ کہتے ہیں ان قبروں کے مکیں بہت بہاد تھے۔ یہ قبریں خود میں بسنے والوں کے چلے جانے کے غم کی طرح ہمیشہ تازہ رہیں گی اور ہمیشہ جوان رہیں گی۔

December

December was my favorite month of the year while growing up especially the last 10 days, the excitement of a new year. The chill was not only in the air but one can feel it inside; all the dry fruit, all the saag and all the hoodies. You have to be warm from inside to feel the cold that lives outside. We use to have Ramzan in December when I was growing up and I was also a student at the Presentation Convent, Hassanabdal and we use to get Christmas holidays too. So, the December was both blessed and merry.

My love for December continued even when I was no longer a third grade student. I still loved December when I was a teen or when I was a university student and even then when I was a boy, working at my father’s construction site, out there in the open. December’s appeal never depreciated not even a dime but then the December of 2014 happened. After the 16^th of December, 2014 everything changed. Suddenly, December was synonymous with loss, sorrow, mourning, excruciating pain, and grief. December has lost its mojo. Now it was the worst month of the year. The following December, the wound got fresh again; ripe as it was on the day one. December was lost. December was gone. Every reference to the month ended up on the mentioning of the unfortunate day of 16^th December, 2014, like the month has no other day. I wished that I close my eyes on the 31^st of November and open them on the 1^st of January, skipping the whole month. The worst part of a misery is that you have to live through it. December was my misery.

But then I had an epiphany. I realized that you not only mourn the dead but you celebrate the survivors. December was no longer bad but now it stands for promising that we will not let it happen again to all the other mothers. We faltered in our promise but the resolve is still there. Now, I love December again but with a pinch of melancholy. Now it is not just a month, it is message that reads love and cherish your own and protect them at any cost. It is a pledge that says that we will not let it happen again. It is a resolve that affirms that we will never put our foot down and it is a reminder that how low our enemies can stoop. Today December stands for many things and I love it for this.   

The World

The world is big

The world is small
What the world really is?
You can never be sure
But the thing about the world is that
The world is today
The world is present
The world is now

The melting ice cream

I know pain

I have seen hope

Nowhere to run

Nowhere to hide

I am a failed revolution

Just picking what is left

Thinking the unthinkable

Supporting a lost cause

Pursuing a gone case

Once thought that nothing is beyond help

I am the judge, jury and executioner

But you cannot bring back the dead  

He

He can play with words

He can even slay with them

He thinks high

But only of himself

You do not know him

But you owe him

He is the king who knows no father

All that bad that is out there

He was the target

He is the victim

Whosoever told him the truth

He jumped on him

Like a mouse in danger

Otherwise happy to nibble away

Anything that is good or bad

He lives under his own pity

He licks his wounds to keep them fresh

He who do not want your respect

He who only wishes for your sympathy

Accomplice not victim!!

Hollywood especially and movie business in general is all about making and selling dreams. The common man looks at the world of movies with a mix of awe and amazement. It is their escape from the daily grind of reality. It is not that the non-filmi men and women are interested in movies alone; the personal lives of the people that are part of the movie business too attract a lot of attention from their fans. However, the reality is that the movie people are as much good or bad as your next person.

Harvey Weinstein is a or was a famous Hollywood producer, who has produced films like Pulp Fiction, The Lord of the Rings, The Artist and Silver Lining Playbook. As reported by the New York Times and The New Yorker, he over the years have sexually harassed, assaulted and raped dozen of women. The list includes many A-list actresses such as Heather Graham, Angelina Jolie and Gwyneth Paltrow. Although on his behalf his spokesman has denied the rape charges but has not denied the rest of the allegations. Mr. Weinstein has been relieved from his duties at his production company and is currently on a sabbatical and is pursuing therapy and counseling to “deal with this issue head on”.

Sexual Harassment, in short is bullying and coercion of a sexual nature or the unwelcome promise of rewards in exchange for sexual favors. The term was first used in the 1970’s but sexual harassment existed even before that and in every culture in one form or the other. But the recent Harvey Weinstein controversy has really lit up this issue like never before; an issue that all prefer to hush-up and keep mum about. 

I have no sympathies for the man, frankly I do not. It is not because I am not allowed to but because he is really a sick man and his actions demands that he should be kept away until he is not fit to be part of the human society. But someone has to look on the other side of the coin too. Was he alone in this? This is a big question. All those women who are today coming out, breaking their silence and are saying that they were subject to sexual harassment at the hands of Harvey include actresses, temps and production assistants from Harvey’s production company. Few of them even made out of court of settlements. I seriously believe that they are responsible for the next girl that had to go through that disgusting experience because it was their silence or whatever reason they have made up to soothe their conscious that encouraged Harvey to continue with his antics and prey on other women.

I also feel that in this scenario Harvey is a victim too because all these starlets that were in their struggling phase benefitted from his vulnerability and used his weakness to boost their own careers. They could have taken the high road and have said “no” and should have made noise, loud enough so that others could have got warned. Today, it is easier to chant “Me too” or point fingers towards the fallen film producer. It really had meant something if they had done it when it was their moment to seize the moment. It surely must have cost them something but they preferred their own tiny goals over greater good of all.

I know ours is not an easy world for women and you do not have to be a feminist to feel for the women. The reality of our times is that we are selling mere symbols in the name of women empowerment. Frankly, we ourselves believe that by shunning dopatta or barring a female midriff means empowerment or her dancing with men means freedom. All this has nothing to do with women empowerment; all this is just further exploitation of women. This does not make women safe at the work place. However, it can also not be achieved through education and by changing the social perception of women alone; because there will always be powerful, there to exploit. So, the only solution to this problem is speaking up and speaking up at the right moment, ready to face whatever the resultant challenges will be.

If you have faced sexual harassment you are a victim but if you do not do something about it timely, then you are an accomplice.

I am not proud of my wife!!

The word proud is defined as a feeling of deep pleasure or satisfaction which is a result of one’s own achievements. Keeping in mind the definition and me, my wife can never be proud, at least of me. However, the last time when I told my wife that I am proud of her she replied what do you want to eat for dinner? She thought I am buttering her to get some butter chicken.

Husband and wife share a very complex relationship. It is a relationship in which you can see shades of all other relationships. A wife if the situation demands even assumes the role of a mother to her husband. I sincerely believe that a woman when reaches at the epitome of any of her relationships she turns into a mother whether she has started as a sister, friend or a wife. Motherly instincts come natural to almost all the women. It is not some social construct but a part of a female gene pool.

It is not mandatory for husbands and wives to be proud of each other, they should be in love with each other, they should be at war with each other, and they should be at peace with each other. It is the others who should be proud of them not they, themselves because being proud means full stop, stagnation and the relationship of a husband and wife do not need that, they as a person and being part of that marital relationship should be ever growing and evolving. So all those who are reading these lines and are married, please do not be proud of your better halves, be in love with them; in their good and in their bad.